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From the desk of:

The Wisdom of Jean Claude Van Damme
By chance or by providence, these jewels of wisdom found their way to me about a week ago.  Since that discovery, I have probably made over a dozen passes at writing an introduction for them, but nothing measures up.  It did not matter what I produced, nothing came close to the level of excellence that was to follow.  So, as we have learned from the French, if you can’t win (or even if you can, but would rather not make the effort), just surrender. Ladies and gentlemen...the Wisdom of Jean Claude Van Damme.

A cookie has no soul, it's just a cookie. But before it was milk and eggs. And in eggs there's the potential for life. My wife is not my best sexual partner, but she's good with the housework. God gave me a great body and it's my duty to take care of my physical temple. 

From the desk of:

Some Advice for the New Year